of and if...

of promises, lost and never found.
of new memories that never happened
that were supposed to begin...
of hellos', and good- byes', over the phone.

if lost promises were found,
and new memeories restarted...
if hellos' and good-byes' were said in a differently.
what if?

...of the ifs', and if the ofs'...
of the ifs' that could happen,
and if the ofs' that already happened, could be fixed...
what would happen?

burning up so cal...

hey guys... well, there is a fire down in so cal. and so far its burned its way to palm springs, and four firemen have died because of it... (the fire was started by some arsonist...) these fires are going to be going on for a while... and well- my dad is working those fires. could you all please, pray for my dad and all the rest of the firemen, for their protection and the families of those four firemen who died? (one of the pictures, is of a burning fire-engine... three of the firemen killed were caught inside that engine... and burned in there. i have no idea how the other died.)

okay, im back...

hey guys. well, my socal trip is over. and i'm glad to be home. life is better here... not so much drama. i love my family. but when you walk in and all people talk about it," he said she said... and so and so's mad..." you want to be there so whoever has someone to talk to and vent on. but- sometimes its hard. especially with family. cuz it kinda hurts to see your family, doing that to each other...

on a different subject... i spent four and a half hours in a geology class today. it was intresting and all. but, four and a half hours. ahh... it was a long day. i glazed over at one point and started doodling on my paper. it took a few minutes to pull myself back. but- over all, i did feel like i learned quite a bit. and i really liked all the biblical refrence... this class is once a month for five months... so, its not so bad. time wise i mean...

haha! jack, one of my kittens, is sitting here, really trying to get my attention. purring, meowing, cocking his head, and rolling around... but- he's just not getting the attention he wants. then i pick him up, and he's over it... go figure. oh well... he is a stinker, but he's my little buddy. at least until someone takes him away from me. if anyone does. it looks doubtful so far...

hello...

well, im in socal... and am trying to look on the bright side of it. i cant lie im really not all for being here... i kinda wish i werent. and here, like i said in my other posts, we have nothing but fast food. and since i got that whatever disease illness, thing. my food has been even more limited. i wouldnt eat fast food anyways... (and for those of you who dont know; we're not sure about what or which sickness i have. i hate saying i have a disease, even though thats kinna what it is. im not going to die. i would after a period of many years, if it were the one that i dont remember the name of. the other option is less serious. but i wont die tomorrow. at least not from the disease.)
so anyways. our last game of soccer is next weekend. im excited. well kinna... im sad the season is already pretty much over. but- theres always indoor. im missing the game this weekend, to my moms relief. lol! she thinks the mexico team is too ruff. haha.. oh, last game, a really BIG guy on the other team body slammed me. ya... i have to say i think that that was the only game that i was seriously scared of one of the other players. i tried to avoid him the rest of the game. but-that didnt work out too well. i was slammed again. oh well, it happens.
oh today we went to the Ronald Regan Presidential Library. its not a book library, its a museum... it was amazing! i really enjoied it. ill publish some pictures when i get home... i have to say my favorite part was the airforce one room. it had the plane that Regan used to fly in. we were even able to walk through the plane itself. ya, it was pretty much my favorite part.

my non-posting-ness...

hey everyone. sorry for my recent non-posting-ness. dean was outta town again. so i was computerless. anyways. not much has gone on. its been well... everyday-ish; school, chores, running here, running there. you know the basics.
oh but i am going to hopefully, enter something into the fine arts festival. if i finish it. im a little discouraged at the moment... but hey, if anyone wants to do a preformance with me. tell me. i think it would be pretty fun. (i say that now... who knows. im weird like that.) but- besides that, it should be pretty intresting. i cant say that it would be fun. cause all im doing is entering some art piece or another, and waiting to see what happens...
well, i have to go. dean has to use the computer...

NATO...???

im just going to say. that, i thought doing debate this year would be a little more, tolerable... because ive already done it for a year. so i thought that i would do better, and that i would be more confident. well, this year the task of speech and debate, still proves to be difficult. i feel lost on the whole subject of NATO. ive done a grip of research. and sill have no idea, what im really debating. this seems to be my problem. i did the same thing last year.

i just remembered why i dont like this class...

today...

well, remember before, in my last post, when i said i hadn't died... but that i felt like i did. well, i seriously feel like i have. ahhhh.... i went to bed last night, (or morning) at three a.m... yes and it looks like it'll be a late night tonight too. cause i still have dishes to put away and i have to pick out my church clothes. (not that picking out church clothes takes a lot of time... but when your tired, picking out clothes of any sort is a chore. and it seems like it takes forever.)
the reason i went to bed soo late last night, was because i spent the night over at the wrights house. we were up talking all the way.. until the wee hour of three. yes. so im tired. not to mention i did spend a few hours in the sun. (i could not find any shade. seriously.) i did crazy cleaning in a short amount of time, and i babysat... ya, it was a full day. but- it was a good day.

...crazyness...

hey... wow. i think this is the earliest post ive done. its not too early though...
well, just wanted to say that i didnt die. (yet...) jus kidding. nope i didnt die. but i kinda felt like i did for a while.
today is a pretty full day. crazy. oh well, i kinda like the crazyness. (as long as my mom isnt stressed) we first are going to lompoc to do sewing at my moms friends house. then im meeting a friend at starbucks, from there i have a soccer game. then last but not least to the wrights. i doesnt sound crazy. but each thing is an hour or more, so when im done with one, its about time for the other.
well, thats kinda it.

first day...

hey hey... i finally had my first day at the barn. it was pretty amazing. i think it would be a cool trade just to have if ever i needed to use it... while i was there, i painted my moms tea hutch. then detailed it... so when i first painted it, i painted it a deep red color. then i put a layer of charcole grey. then- i took a paint scraper and scraped all the edges and corners, to give it an older more antique look. yes, i must say... it turned out pretty amazing. it looks kinda pirate-ish... i also started building a picture frame. its not even close to done. but- oh well. it will get there.

~Thailand~

hey everyone, my friend just got back from thailand... and she got a staph infection while in one of the hospitals. (most likely.) so please pray for her. and my parents and i are thinking that it might be a possibility that i could go back to thailand with her when she goes next. which, would be next september. it would be a mission tripo. so, i would only go for a month or so but, shes planning on going permenetly. i have a good year left but- to go on a missins trip there would be hard. because you pretty much are out i the boonies. and its considered impolite not eat what ever they set infront of you. which means rice, leaves, bugs, and monkey poo. yes monkey poo. im a little worried about the whole monkey poo idea. i mean a person could get sick because of that. and, there are desieses there, just like here but- a whole great deal worse. seeing as the karen have limited medical access, so things arent taken care of as they should be. so please pray for her full recovery so that she could go serve, and that God would make clear whether or not this is a place that he would want me to go serve.

*yours for the taking*

i currently have seven cats. five of which are kittens, who- are up for adoption. yes, and it looks like i cant even keep one. sad thing. i think i have to give my two favorites, Isabella and Jack. oh! they all have names but- you are welcome to rename them, of course. just wanted to let you all know that cuz, the person i adopted diana from, wanted me to keep her name. i think it used to be star or something cheesy like that. oh well. (haha, she actually has about three or four names... everyone has a nick name for her.)
so yes, anyways, please let me know if you want one... they are house trained, and are at the precise age to be taken.... for the sake of my parents, let me know as soon as you can.

a quote...

hey everyone, i just wanted to post a quote, that was in one of my history books...

"We should always seek for truth and knowledge,
but we should remember that knowledge and wisdom are of worth,
only if we let our lives be governed by them."

~ Cardinal Nicholas of Cusa

i would love to say more but- i have a library worth of school work to do....

september 15th...

well, tomorrow is carter's birthday. he will be a whole three years old. oh man, i cant believe it. three years ago, on september 15th, i took my siblings out to the play room that was seprate from our house.... eating cherios and apple sause for meals and watching lord of the rings... patiently waiting for him to finally be here... and he came.
let me tell you, carter has put up with a lot these few short years, in his life so far. he has already done some crazy stunts. (becoming a dare devil at an early age.) haha.... well, its kinda sad really. i can remeber this one time when he was around nine months old and my uncle thought it would be fun to push him, in his push car, down the stairs leading to the lower area of the acre and a half we lived on. despite the fact that i told him that we would be better off, it this just didnt happen, he decided to not pay heed to my caution. so he, starts decending down, the stairs, when he suddenly lost his footing and fell forward... giving carters little car, a very nice push... carter went flying down the stairs, with me not too far in toe, and did a flip... ladding upside down. yes, if it werent for the little seat belt holding him in.... he would have died, or at least been pretty significantly injured. to say the least, my uncle almost died that day too. (we later found my uncle hiding in a tree. no lie.) then of course i was a little bit of a help in the developing of his dare devilness... i enjoyied, pushing him all around yard at full speed, in yet again his little red push car. mind you, he enjoied it just as much as i did. course, my mom wasnt too thrilled.... basiclly, in these three years, he has encountered many more crazy stunts like these. given the exception of one... in just a sightly different situation. which my mom also wanted to kill someone for... months after his second birthday, a friend of mine asked him if he would like his head to be farted on... to which, my inocent two year old brother replied," sure!" haha, ya. and carters head was farted on. after which he said," oh no! you poopied!" haha.... ya, that person doesnt know how closely life would have ended. (i dont think my mom would have seriously killed my friend... thats just what she said...)
anyways, enough with memeories... tomorrow, for his birthday, carter wants to go to the muh-zoo. (ya, he hasnt quite gotten the hang of the word 'zoo' yet.) so, hes excited. i think we all are. none of us have been to the santa barbra zoo yet. so, yes... a day at the zoo. which carter swears he came from... again, no lie.

life is good....

well, my first day of crazy school classes is almost over... and i have to tell you, it wasnt as bad as i thought it was going to be. i had my first class of physics today.... and my first class of speech and debate. i think this debate class is going to be way better, and a lot more less stressful. no one day, write a whole speech thing. yay... then to top the day off, i finished with a starbucks.... mmm, a misto, with a shot of toffee nut. oh man was it good, as always.... ive gone to bucks so much that when i walk in they say,"the usual?" (and-i get a free drink every now and then.)

oh, after physics today, one of the guys kept asking questions about wildwood. cause i havent seen him for a while... and he just kept saying," tell me more, tell me more..." haha... i wanted to die of laughter. it came to a point where, i had to tell him, that i really had nothing further to say... even then he was convinced there was more... he just kept on saying, "tell me more." so, i ended up just rambling on a few funny things that happened... let me tell you, if his ride hadnt said," its time to leave...." i guarantee that i would have been doing a lot of rambling. i didnt mind it that much... it brought back some good memories...

well, my sabbatical has so far turned out for the better. i thought id be bored. but- i really have plenty to do... even though a lot of the of the stuff i do, is stuff im required to do, i still enjoy it. (yes even school, to a degree.) oh! i start my job at the barn tomorrow morning, im so excited... and to top it off, ive even gotten a few answers to a few prayers... everything has become more enjoyable.... life- is good.

...my sabbatical....

well, my parents and i have been talking... and we've decided that i need a sabbatical from a few things.... so, there will be a lot of things that i will disappear from. lol! i think, i'm going to be working at the barn a few times a week. and i'll be working at the home-less shelter on tuesdays. then there are various other things that i'll be dabbling in. (which are at the moment being looked into. ) not to mention, i have a ton of school to do...
im pretty excited about the first two listed... i've been wanting to go work at the barn for the last year or so... pretty much ever since i went there to check it out, on last years fourth of july... yet again, another hobbie... then, working at the home-less shelter... i think will be a good thing over all. although, i cant really describe what i think about that, completely.... i think that i would also like to find a plant nursery to work at... (just so you all know, the barn is where my cousin and brother made their picture frames... but there are a great many other things that i can make there.)

haha, i have currently also picked up the hobbie of making my own paper and journals... though right now the only thing i've been able to do with that, is the paper. (which im also still working out all the tools that i need for it.) i need to get a little better at it before i start making journals.

whale watching trip...

Ben's Barn.....

the boys made these picture frames at ben's workshop/barn.... (jacob, left) (brody, right) well, done lil' bros....

...non-survival, and urgent care...

well, ive decided that this year is going to be a non-survival year. i just found out that i already have a class tomorrow at 9:30 a.m. i have now come to the reality of, the quantity of crazy classes and soccer games i have... and i have to say," boy did i really add to the load on my plate...." i can only hope that somehow, through everything, that i will make it through to be, in the end, alive. (even if my life is only an inch of a thread long. haha...) but- its all going to be worth it... i think. to be able to graduate early. even if its only by one year...
haha... i spent almost three hours in urgent care today... missing soccer practice during it... all because of a foot injury. oh man... i was sad. cause i really need the practice. seriously. but- it looks like its all in my favor. nothing too life threatening. haha...
dean is going out of town again... for, i have no idea how long. and so once again ill be computer-less. (out of town for work. again.)
uh... ive bee trying to post some pictures on here. and the image thing wont work. has anyone else had that problem? or is it just my computer? ya, its most likely my computer.
well, good night to you all. i should really go. i have an early start tomorrow... so long.

survival...

hey everyone... got back from camp today... it was pretty fun. as usual. i have to say that our youth room, has pretty amazing activities... and you always seem to benefit from what you learn in Christ at all of the camps. although- to be fair, i have to give the camps credit. but- seeing that our youth room organizes our trips, the staff and james deserve a pat on the back... oh man, we had some pretty amazing adventures. haha... kaleb and jen were so funny at the talent show. i laughed until my sides ached... zach was pretty funny too... he can lip sink pretty crazy. but- i think my most favorite parts were: the great race, our 'Y' time, and just being with everyone. so it was a good weekend. oh, when we were up there... a few of us went on a little hike to the falls. i think that that place was amazingly beautiful. aw, man its times like those that make me want to just praise God and thank Him for all that he blessed us with. sometimes its just the simple things that give the most pleasure.
well, my uncle is here.... im not sure how longs hes staying. not much longer i imagine. hes already been up here since saturday- i think. and he has work. but, you can never tell, family can be pretty unpredictable. haha... i love him, hes so fun to be around... him and i have had some pretty good times; on the the road just being silly and random. all our little adventures...
oh man you guys... i could use some prayer with school. its going to be a pretty crazy next two years. as im still planning on graduating a year early... please just pray that i would stay motovated and that i would get through it all alive. (cause right now, to me, my chance of survival seems very slim.)

...untitled...

well, ill be pretty much computer-less the next few days... unless, i perchance, happen to go to a friends house... in which case they would most likely have one... i hope for the best in this area... (not that ill have a whole lot of time to get on... things now become crazy...)at least as far as school and various other activities...
camp will be a good break... im soo excited for it. i havent been to this one yet.
i have to say that this year has been the first time for all my camps. so, its all pretty exciting. (though, ive heard of some interesting games at kickback.) but- i really have a vague idea of this camp. whereas the others ive had more insight...
haha... oh man... im stuck awake again. and i have to get up early too. oh what to do, what to do? there isnt much to do. at least at this hour in the night. everyone else is sleeping. well, my mom isnt. but- shes pretty much getting in bed. soo, just me and this laptop.