my heart beat so hard, i think i cracked a rib

wow. i literaly just woke up (7:34am). i had a scary dream. ive never had a dream like this before.

i woke up and my heart felt like it was pounding against my rib cage (and for a few mintutes, that was the only sound i could her) and i was breathing fast and deep... took me a minute to calm down. even then my heart was still going crazy.

the beginning of my dream was really sad. i cried a lot. so did a few other people. it was horrible. i was crying because i felt like a horrible person!. the others were cryng because of me. all i wanted to do was fix it and make it better. i felt like i had no power to do so.

the next section of my dream everything was happy. everyone was happy. things seemed better for the most part.

after things were getting better, we went to meet some people at the beach. something happened though... my mom and i were driving seprate cars, i was in the volvo with jake, noelle, and carter. mom was in one of our other two cars, alone. i think her car broke down (or disappeared). we were driving on opposite sides of the freeway. one of those crazy bridges that lift you, what feels like, 3hundred thousdand feet from the gravel floor. we were on one of those. except different ones. so we were like half a mile apart on one of those things. so i was stopped on the other side, and she on the other.

a huge black guy in a scratchy, wool sweater and jeans was dropped off right infront of my car. all the kids had gotten out and i had been trying to keep them from getting run over and back in the car again. the guy came up to me and grabbed me. i screamed, asking him what he was doing and why. he told me it was very important. i then asked him what he wanted. all he said was he wanted a red bag. however, i didnt have a red bag. i had no idea what he wanting to do now that i had told him that. either he didnt believe me, or he didnt care. he slammed me to the gravel floor. all my sibs stood helpless. cept for jake who was kicking the man halfheartedly with an odd expression on his face. the whole time this was going i kept thinking, this cant be happening. i told myself to pull together and kick him or punch him in the throat (like i had been taught). in the end i found that i couldnt. he had a hold on me that felt like i had no way to defend myself. an arm came loose and i would swing at him. my mom was helpless on the other side. i figured she was calling the cops. in the end i woke up and never found out if i made it. its wierd, kind of remember a red bag in the beginning or middle of my dream...

hope i didnt bore you...

talk to you all later. i have to get ready to go to the beach....

laters