I tend to look ahead a lot in life... I dwell on what could be in the future when I should booking at what is in the present. I have no idea why I do this. Maybe it's because I have an idea of what I think will be the best part of my life here on this Earth, and what's not the best part; the future being the better part of my life and the present being not so. Does that make me perpetually unsatisfied then? Why should I be unsatisfied when every chapter I turn, and every block I lay down, is a step toward this ultimate moment; this ultimate goal. Why would I want to skip the present moments, as I so often desire, to get to the ones ahead? Every one of those moments help define what my future will be... They are all included in the devine blueprints that my Creator has so carefully planned out for me... So why, in my right mind, would I desire to move past them at lightening speed? I should have ultimate happiness in these moments because my Father has created them for me, before my life was every a fleeting thought in the minds of my parents. Though, I know that it is not bad for me to grieve and feel sadness in times of hardship and tragedy... Still, as a child of my Heavenly Father, I should be looking upward toward the heart of His plan, searching for the strength to accept this beat in the blueprint He has made for my life.

I can still be excited for my future while relishing and rejoicing in the present, so long as I am not so overcome with desire for my future that I dismiss the present.

"Never are voices so beautiful

as on a winter's

evening, 

when dusk almost hides

the body,

and they seem to issue from nothingness

with a note of intimacy seldom

heard by day."

Night and Day - Virginia Woolf

Oh dear,

What to do.

Everyone seems to be transitioning 

over from blogger

to tumblr.

Is blogger the myspace of

this scenario and tumblr the facebook?

Oh dear... 

I've had a long day of finals and house cleaning,

and have finally come to a

moment of rest;

I have been doing some eye

studies in my

sketchbook, whilst sipping

peppermint tea. 

I need my Jordie for this moment.

Rossina Bossio Bossa

A Thing of Beauty

Please Let Me

Live in dresses and sweaters

Spend the day painting flowers and drawing birds

Grow butterfly wings

Sing the day through

Swim under the Sea and find hidden treasures

Grow my hair long long long and lace it with baby's breath

Run through meadows barefoot

Talk to animals

Bask in perfect sunlight

Longing

I long for a time of rest.

A time when

I can create my own home for the family

that I have yet to begin.

I long for the peace of reading amid

my small, fruitful

garden that I have so very diligently tended and

nurtured in the cool

of the afternoons.

I long for a time when all I 

have to learn, is how to further become a 

Proverbs 31 woman,

through and through.

I long for the day

when my artistic endeavors will be granted

full pardon to 

the order of a day; pure

unrestrained 

creation.

I long to teach my yet to be had children

all that I have discovered
and learned

on my 

unavoidable path of

entrepreneurship.

henri fantin-latour

Possibilities, discover, wonderful.

Does your mind run a-muck with

possibilities when you

see untouched paper?

Does your heart flutter when you see a

tube of paint and

hold a paintbrush in your hand?

Does your breath catch when you  discover

new mediums?

I know mine does, and it is 

chaotically wonderful.

It does the heart and soul good

to daydream for 

a while, 

even when you know 

that you should be studying for an

upcoming exam.

A Thing of Beauty

Katherine Hilbery...

"Although thus supported by the knowledge of his new possession of considerable 

value, he was not proof against the familiar thoughts which

the suburban streets and the damp shrubs growing

in front of gardens and the absurd names painted in white upon the 

gates of those 

gardens suggested to him."

~ Virginia Woolf, Night and Day

Bit of a Belated Post for Adam

This post is belated, but my justification

for this is perfectly understandable, as my day was spent in

prep work for Adam's

surprise Valentines Day night<3

My Love:

I cannot believe that it has already been two years! 

Time has flown so fast, 

and yet I remember every day. 

I am looking forward to another year of unforgettable moments

spent with you

(and all the years paving the way to the end of time). 

You are the sweetest, most gentle man I know, 

and I am so blessed and ecstatic to

be a part of your life; thank you for sharing it with me.

I don't know why you chose

me, but I am thankful that you did, more and more

every day.

Thank you for being my shoulder, and for leaving your shoulder

open 24 hours a day, seven days a week

(you don't even take the weekends off!)

You have guided and comforted me through hard, sad times

and through this, 

I know that we have grown 

closer and the bond 

between us has grown stronger. 

We have spent months apart, and ran into each others' arms 

in the end. I treasure those moments

more than I could ever spell out, as well 

as the overwhelming excitement I feel in my throat

and the butterflies that brush their tiny wings against

my rib cage, at the thought of

seeing you again.

I love all of our Biblical, theological discussions and 

how much I glean from your

knowledge. 

You truly are a man after

God's own heart,

and that is something I rejoice in 

and thank God for:)

I love that we can be silly together; making our cheeks

sore with our smiles. 

I love that we can even be silly

in public, acting as if the world weren't laughing at us;

being completely oblivious 

to the looks people give us as they pass by.

I love laughing with you 

as much as I love the air I breathe.

Most of all, I have to tell you,

that my love for you is undefinable

and near impossible to portray with earthly revelations. 

Love Like A Hurricane

He is jealous for me.

Loves like Hurricane, 

I am a tree

Bending beneath the weight of His

wind and mercy.

When all of a sudden, 

I am unaware 

of these afflictions eclipsed by glory.

And I realize just how

beautiful You are and how great your affections

are for me.

O, how he loves us so.

O, how He loves us

How he loves us so.

Unexpected Beauty

Something that I never thought I would ever say:

It can be very beautiful down

here in the desert, especially when you are 

driving before the sun;

with all the city lights glowing in the 

soft, pre-dawn light.

Witnessing, the gentle, orange sunlight

stretch across fields and touch mountain peaks, with

all the snow covered mountains peeking through the scene in the 

background. 

Then, as the sun rises higher, it's light

highlights creeping fog that clings to the trunks of

barren, knarled trees and slithers

through the dew-decorated

field grass.