Last Train Ride ( late post )

Well this train is taking me home. I am always sad to leave but happy to be home. It is so confusing at times. How can you be so sad yet happy about the process and outcome of the same thing? It doesn’t make any sense to me. It is like torture. It is like a vicious cycle. You think,” how could I be so happy to leave!? Then you think,” but I am excited to be home,” missing the people there. After which you feel bad for being sad about being happy to be home. Feeling like you made the loved ones there less important. The same thing happens for the family you are leaving. It repeats itself for both places. I spose this is just how it goes with these things.

It was a good trip. Dad got home Friday morning and we all just spent time hanging around the house. Saturday brought grandma and grandpa and sushi; a late birthday for me(: I ran some errands with dad a few times. I always like to do that. They are all going to be coming out for my graduation. I am excited about that. They will stay through the weekend. Hopefully I’ll get to take dad surfing. I asked him if he would go out with me, and he said that he would(: they aren’t really sure where they will be staying yet. It is still pending.

Oh man… these things make me so motion sick. But there is nothing I can do about it! There is no window to look out of… and I can’t just sit here doing nothing. I mean this is like a six-hour trip. We are coming up to Ventura soon, half way home. Its almost five. I have spent the time so far reading and watching “Step Into Liquid.” I finished the latter but was so sick after that and reading that I had to stop reading. So I didn’t finish the book. If I were being studious, I would be reading my astronomy book. However, I fail at being studious.

I got a few Barnes N Noble cards. I am pretty excited. I miss reading! After I read the Twilight trilogy, I have just been aching for some good books. Before that I was reading the classics. I just need a break from them. I love them! Don’t get be wrong. But after a time of reading pretty much nothing but (outside of school reading of course) you get a little burnt out on them. So it is candy reading for a time. Haha! I bought “Stardust” to read on the train. Its good so far. I have a feeling that I am coming onto the good stuff.

I’m looking for a song to sing and play for my graduation, If I can’t write one and compose by then. Or if I have it might not be good… so suggestions are very welcome!! I was looking at a Priscilla Ahn song. I don’t know how many of you know her. If there is a song by her ( or even someone else ) that you think I should give a look into, let me know!!

Wow, another long post from a train. Sorry about that.

Morning From A Southbound Train

I’m on a southbound train. Got up at 5:30 this morning. I feel so dead right now. You know when you are so tired that you are nauseated? That’s me right now, too many early mornings and late nights in a row. Didn’t get coffee this morning either. I would sleep but I always have a hard time sleeping in public transportation. It feels awkward to me. Haha. Maybe I am just ridiculous.

I can’t complain too much. I have gotten to check out the surf all along the coast for the whole morning. I can’t say that I have seen any good surf this morning. I think there were a few surfable areas though:) I have wanted to surf so badly these last few days.

I miss surfing. I used to be able to surf so much before school. Well, I had school then too, just not classes that I had to be at. It was all home classes then with no scheduled homework (at least last year), giving me a lot of free time to surf. Those were the days. I’ll make up for it though. I am going to start going more. Especially in the summer. Which- I have a goal set for, by the way. I hope I can reach it. I’ll have some help though:)

It’s so gorgeous right now! I can’t remember the technical name for them, but the flats next to the ocean are so amazing! The grass is long and a beautiful green. I saw two deer in one. In another, a little flock of birds flew out of a thicket, and I wondered what startled them? Most likely this train… it could have been something else. Or maybe they just decided they were bored of their current thicket and decided to move on to a better one. I felt kinda envious of them. They get to live in such a choice spot, over looking the ocean. It gives me a little reminder of God’s glory. He has created such wondrous things. Sometimes I forget to really appreciate them as I should. I just get caught up in whatever the day brings or has scheduled. It’s good to just sit and appreciate God’s handy work. Lol!

I love passing by the houses and seeing surfboards in the backyards. It makes me smile. The water isn’t visible anymore. Which, is why I am on here.

I can’t wait to go to sleep. Though I don’t know how early I’ll be able to. I never sleep well when I am down there. Speaking of sleep, I just watched a drowsy lady stumble down the stairway. She had been sleeping the whole time she was on the train. Don’t know why that was amusing, but it was.

You know, I realized that I love beach towns. I love their quirky one way streets, the clustered funky colored little beach houses, the surfers running with their boards down to the water, all the surf shops, contrary to how most people feel about the sand, I love it, not all beach towns have them, but I love the piers too. I would love to live on the beach and have access to surf every morning. It seems like such a quaint, simple lifestyle. I could care less about big expensive houses, big expensive cars, going to expensive places all the time, and having ALL the latest and greatest… give me surf and sand over that any day.

The Trees

" If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason."
~Jack Handy

Vintage Cherry Blossoms

i cant believe that i gave into this. i told myself that i wouldnt get on because i have to be up so early tomorrow for school. and yet- here i am. my mind feels wide awake but my body is completely tired. when will my mind tire out? give me some room for rest? right now, it feels like never. i cant really list the things that are fogging my head. there are too many. its like my mind is desperately trying to come to some conclusion to these thoughts and clear them away for the night. usually coming to an end of a thought only brings forth another. i spose this is just how it goes. more often than not, this occurs. sometimes, keeping me up later than i would have imagined. time just slips away when your mind is clouded with, well, everything. everything in the sense that it feels like everything. i know its not everything...

i had just finished reading my Bible before this and found this verse:
" Come, let us walk in
the light of the Lord."
Is. 2:5

for some reason, this verse brought me a feeling of peace.

i am going to try to calm these cascading thoughts and settle down for the night. i have no idea how well this will work, but i am willing to fight for it. :)